Coaches “Stow”ked With Good Cup Performance

It was another County Cup game and Stroud needed to get back to winning ways after their recent loss to Bredon. They de-camped to Archway School to take on a powerful Stow forward pack, but with a few absentees in the Stroud pack that would give opportunities for others to get increased playing time. Flash had also got a call up to Afghanistan front line as a starter. Something about great sniping ability. Luckily he missed the plane and turned up at Archway to show his scrum half prowess in the absence of Hilly.

The match reporter got to the game just in time, mumbling some excuses about ‘dodgy last pint’. Was he ready to perform as well as the players normally do?

Forwards: Liam, Orgy, Sauce, Jedd, Laurie, Keyan
Backs: Flash, Will, Dave, Arthur, Finn, Joe, Alex
Subs: Lucas, Mr T, Darrian, Edgar, Archie, Nibbles

The game kicked off and Stroud wearing their famous Black and White hoops started strongly. Frank passed to Jim, who cut inside with Bob and Geoff providing great support. The match reporter was on fire today until a sarcastic parent reminded him that we wore Blue and I was reporting on the wrong team. As long as that was the only mistake I made I would get away with it. As long as I keep the score correctly that’s all that matters and the few minor match report inaccuracies would be glossed over with no one spotting my errors…..

So Stroud had received the kick off and eventually won a scrum that they did well to win. Stow quickly forced a turnover though and attacked right but a typical strong Finn tackle slowed them down. Stow were already starting to show dominance at the breakdown and got quick ball out to their backs who attacked both left and right and closed in on the try line. Just as a score seemed inevitable stout Stroud defence held up the big Stow forward. Stow had a scrum 5 which they won and attacked right and scored the opening try for 1-0 lead.

Stow chose to kick off and showed great technique to recover the ball right on the 10 yard line. Liam showed no respect for this and just tackled the guy and ripped the ball loose. Quick ball came out to Will who saw an opening and attacked left. Stow snuffed out the threat but it was too late as Will timed a perfect pass to Dave who accelerated down the left wing and scored in the corner for 1-1.

Another Stow kick off and Alex’s turn to catch cleanly and quickly distribute the ball to Will to start another attack. Will threw a beautiful long pass to Dave who drew the defender and then passed to Finn who carried on the move into the Stow half. Good Stow defending won a turnover and they kicked deep. Alex caught the ball and ran it back direct and Stow were penalised at the ruck. Jedd took the penalty ball and rumbled forward. Another strong Stow tackle knocked the ball backwards and an alert Dave picked it up and ran to the right and looked close to scoring. Stow showed great perseverance though to chase him down and then somehow steal the ball themselves and turn defence into attack. From deep in their own half Stow ran the ball back right and a fractured Stroud defence missed a few opportunities to snuff out the attack and paid the price with Stow showing good hands and their centre scoring in the right corner to re-instate their lead at 2-1.

Stow again kicked short but Finn had anticipated this and ran onto the ball at pace and burst through a few tackles and looked to be in with a chance of scoring but Stow did well to force him out of play on the left. Stow took the line-in pass but Sauce put in a great tackle. Stow kept the ball alive though and attacked right. Laurie tackled well and a maul formed. As more bodies got sucked in Arthur managed to emerge from the swarm of limbs carrying the ball. He was slowed up but Jedd was in good supporting position and took the ball on and running through a few players. He was slowed up and the ball came out to Dave and he again saw a gap and backed his pace to exploit it. Stows covering tackle brought Dave down but he offloaded in the pass to Joe who had grown great pace to provide support and he reaped the benefits with a run to the right corner and an equalising score of 2-2.

Stow kicked off and Will ran it back and passed to Finn. Stow again dominated at the ruck and won the ball and attacked themselves and got close to Stroud’s 22 but a good tackle from Sauce then gave Orgy the chance to win the ball. Will got the ball and made the right decision to kick long. Stroud did a great kick chase which forced Stow to knock-on as soon as they got the ball. Stroud won the scrum and attacked left. In a planned move Dave did an inside ball to Alex who was running straight. Good forward support from Liam and Jedd kept the ball alive and they attacked left. Another ruck and another good clearout from Laurie and Sauce meant Flash got quick ball out to the right and Dave drew the defenders and then passed to Keyan who had an easy run to the line and scored under the posts for Stroud’s first lead at 3-2.

Subs started with Joe and Jedd off and Edgar and Mr T on. Stow kicked off and Orgy caught it well and made a few yards before he was dragged down and again Stow won the breakdown but were unfortunate to knock-on. Stroud won their scrum and again the backs showed their skills. Will to Dave, to Alex, and then back to a looping Will who drew the tacklers and tried his new behind the back pass back to Dave on the inside. Unfortunately the ball went slightly forward and his only reward for showing off this move directly in front of the parents was a bray of ‘Eeyore’ from a typically sympathetic Chris O on the sideline.

Stow won the scrum but were penalised for holding on in the tackle with Liam in prime position to win the ball. Laurie took the penalty ball and crashed through a few tackles. The forwards supported well with the clearout and Sauce picked up the loose ball and also made some good yardage. Unfortunately he outran the support which meant Stow won the breakdown and ran the ball back themselves. A brave Edgar tried to tackle the Stow forward but was rewarded with a knock. Mr T did a big tackle though and Stroud won the ruck. Play went through a few phases but an injured Edgar had to be replaced by Archie. Stroud won a scrum and Flash saw the gap and sniped down the side and got close to the Stow line. The full back managed to get in the way though and as we thought the chance had disappeared Flash unselfishly passed out to Archie who scored in the left corner for 4-2 lead.

With the hangover clearing the match reporter started to think of headlines. “The Archieway with Archie to Archie at Archway” sprung from the pen. If the Times, Telegraph or SNJ wanted to use it then royalties payable to R Vale would cost £5. If in fact it was classed as cheesier than the post-match pasta then please make all complaints to the Press Complaints Commission and blame the wanabee reporter of Mr SJ Evans.

Sauce went off and Darrian replaced him. Stow kicked off short and again recovered their own kick. They quickly attacked through their lively backs and got close to the line. Arthur and Alex combined well to put in some try saving tackles but Stow kept the ball alive and powered over the line but were held up and we ripped the ball loose before it could be grounded. Stroud ran the ball out but Stow forced a maul that then got rewarded with their scrum. Orgy did a great strike though under pressure and won the ball and Dave kicked deep to relieve the pressure. Keyan sprinted to the retreating Stow defender and as soon as he picked up the ball Keyan tackled him. The ball came loose and Keyan showed great technique to finish off the exciting passage of play with a pick up and try scoring run – end to end in about 20 seconds of play for a 5-2 lead.

Stow kicked deeper and Archie ran it back but Stow were alert enough to tackle well and win the ruck. Stow attacked back but a punishing Mr T/Keyan sandwich tackle was waiting as a reward! A few more phases of play progressed resulting in Stroud being awarded a penalty. The ball was run left with Arthur carrying on the move. Ball came back to Keyan and he came back to the right and as the overlap formed he missed the opportunity to keep the ball moving right and he cut back inside and got isolated. Stow did well to drag him down though and then stole a turnover. Will did a strong tackle to snuff out any chance of a long Stow run back. Stow kept the ball alive and it was Arthur’s turn to put in a great tackle. Stow showed great technique with the pick and runs though and made good yardage up the right wing in front of their baying parents. Stroud were on the back foot and Stow expertly exploited the gaps. Alex managed to hold up the player on the line but this just gave Stow a scrum attacking platform from the 5 metre line. They won their scrum and quickly attacked right and scored in the corner to bring it back to 5-3 and show they would be a force to be reckoned with in the 2nd half.

The half-time whistle went and the match reporter proudly informed the parents that the score was 4-3. This was queried by a few parents and independent ref Jo was asked for his view and he correctly advised it was 5-3. So this was the 2nd big error from the match reporter. He couldn’t even count to 5 with a fuzzy head. Good job he hadn’t marked out the pitch because the weaving lines would have caused a game abandonment and a failure of the sobriety challenge. There was no way he was going to get his reporters match fee of a post match meal at this rate with this quality of work.

Half Time: Stroud 5 – 3 Stow

The 2nd half started with Nibbles coming on for Finn. Will did a perfectly weighted kick that Keyan chased down and picked up the bobbling ball and scored in the left corner to make it 6-3

Stow kicked off again and Will ran it back. Mr T had a good run. Then Arthur made some good gains. He was well supported by Nibbles who was eventually part-tackled but because he wasn’t held he showed great poise to jump up and keep the attack going. He was brought down again but not before he passed to Dave who scored in the right corner for 7-3.

Stow kicked off again and this time Keyan put in a punishing run back. He was eventually hauled down but Darrian and Orgy did a good clearout and Flash took advantage with quick ball out to Will on the left. At the perfect time he passed to Alex who kept the attack going left. He dummied a pass to the left and cut up inside and as Stow managed to recover and close on Alex he passed left to Arthur who had an easy run to the line and 8-3 scoreline.

Stow did not let their heads go down though and chased down their own kick. Stroud managed to win the ruck though and a few short runs by Liam and Darrian drew in the defenders. Keyan went down the blindside and managed to avoid a few tackles. He accelerated down the touchline and managed to avoid the last tackle but the Stow defender was rewarded with forcing a Keyan foot into touch. Stow took the line-in pass and attacked back down the line themselves but Lucas did well to close the gap and tackle the player into touch. Stroud’s line-in went through all the backs hands and Dave finished the looping move with a run to the left corner and a 9-3 lead. Stow were really starting to tire now with all the defending they had to do on the big Archway pitch. They had travelled with no subs so it was with great credit they kept going at 110% effort and making Stroud earn every ruck and try opportunity.

More sub rotations with Arthur off, Alex into centre and Finn to full back. Stow kicked off and Alex ran it back and Stroud earnt a penalty at the breakdown. Keyan ran left and passed to Dave who was tackled out. Stows line-in gave Lucas a chance to put in a strong tackle. Stow won the ruck but it just meant Lucas had another chance to put in a good tackle. His 2nd row partner in crime Mr T then made the next crunching tackle. Stow were still powerful at the breakdown and able to retain the ball. Realising another Lucas or Mr T tackle was waiting for them they spun the ball out wide but Alex brought down the winger and at same time ripped the ball and ran it back. He was dragged down and play settled into alternating phases of attack and defense.

The next noteworthy event was a typical strong Dave tackle that forced a knock-on. Orgy saw his chance and picked up the ball well and ran it back strongly. He unselfishly passed onto Flash who managed to sidestep the Stow defender but got tackled by the muddiest puddle on the pitch. A face plant was his reward and humour abound from the sideline – his parents included. Even with a face full of mud they knew they’d be no post-match shower – it would be a struggle to get him clean for school on Monday…..

The game was stopped soon after for a Stow injury and a chance for Flash to clean his face and Liam and Alex to earn well deserved rests. There was a real keenness for the players to come off the pitch now because they had lovely warm subs jackets to proudly wear. Thanks to Jenks for organising these and please offer him a donation if you haven’t already done so as we’re still a few quid out-of-pocket but they are a great investment for the cold and rainy days ahead. Make us look very professional at all levels of the squad – apart from match reporting as this debacle shows….

Stroud won the scrum restart and Will showed great poise to attack to the left and throw dummy passes and exploit various gaps. Just as we thought another try was a reward a last gasp Stow tackle forced a knock-on and this lung busting try saving tackle was applauded by both sets of parents, and another “Eeyore” from Chris O. Stow won their scrum but a great Stroud push and Orgy hook won Stroud the ball and they attacked right and Dave scored under the posts for 10-3 lead.

Stow were tiring by the minute and didn’t have the benefit of a strong subs bench like Stroud had. This didn’t deter them as a Stroud kick-receive knock-on was quickly punished with a Stow scrum win and run left for a well deserved try and closing to 10-4. Dave was finally rested and rewarded with a subs jacket that Arthur had warmed nicely for him. All this hot air verbals from the players during warm-ups was providing a nice insulating layer in the subs jackets. Who needs Hinkley ‘C’ ?

Stroud kicked off deep and Archie chased the ball well and forced a Stow error. Joe picked up the ball and went on a weaving run. Stow were awarded a penalty though and kicked long but Nibbles covered the ball up well and Darrian helped win the breakdown. Will H received the ball and did a long pass to Joe who ran straight and scored another try and 11-4 lead.

Stows turn to kick off and Joe was straight back into action with a run back and an unfortunate knock on. Stow won the scrum and went left. An alert Flash did a good tackle though but it just delayed the inevitable with Stow winning the breakdown and attacking left again and scoring in the corner to close to 11-5.

Stroud kicked deep and Stow knocked on. As if that wasn’t bad enough Arthur gathered up the ball and swerved inside and expertly passed to Lucas who smashed through a few tackles but was stopped just short of the try line. Darrian and Laurie again did well to keep the ball under Stroud control and Flash saw the overlap and quickly passed left to Arthur who passed onto Archie who scored in the left corner for 12-5 scoreline.

Stow kicked off and Keyan ran back and then Will took it on. Again he threw some dummy passes and made good yardage. At the right time he passed onto winger Archie who was unlucky to knock-on as he saw the hat trick try waiting for him. Stow took the line-in ball and kept the tacking pressure on Stroud but Will snaffled a loose ball which then gave Darrian chance to attack with a good run. Play slowed up so back for a Stow knock-on. Stroud won the scrum and Flash sniped down the side. This was snuffed out but Lucas did a pick and run but was unable to score a try. As the game entered the final phase Stow were awarded a scrum on their own 5 metre line. This just gave Stroud the chance to win another against the head and in a repeat of the previous try Arthur passed to Archie who scored his hat trick try in the left corner as the final whistle blew.

Full Time: Stroud 13 – 5 Stow (or 65-25 in old money)

Wrap Up

The players formed tunnels and applauded each other off the pitch. Stow had put in a sterling effort with no subs to relieve tired players. Stroud had definitely upped their game in the 2nd half but the scoreline would have been closer based on the strong Stow performance in the first half, and the continual ability of their forwards to win turnovers at the breakdown.

The coaches debrief focused on the need to win the breakdown battle and clear players 5 yards off the ball and not just stand over our attacker and get pushed backwards. Again good handling in the attacking phases and strong performance from the wingers was rewarded. A good cup performance though and nice to get back to winning ways.

Hat trick scoring Archie went to get the adulation from his Dad but was met with the ‘how about the knock-on’. Sporting perfection is mandatory in the Evans household to make up for Stu’s earlier football career…… Archie Tries 3-1 Dropped Pass. Chelsea 3-1 Arsenal, Rodboro Footy 3-2 Longlevens, England 19-16 France – does the weekend get any better?

The players went to get changed and be rewarded with a well earnt post match meal. Russell’s better half turned up to make amends to the team for her husband’s literacy performance. She managed to feed the 5000 hungry mouths with 5 loaves of French bread and 2 fish – or was it a big bowl of spagbol pasta? Whatever it was it was well received by both sets of players and coaches with ample helpings of 2nds, and even 3rds for Dave. Anyone that can amply feed Dave deserves a Cook-of-the-Match mention. She did such a good job that she is rewarded with the same gig next weekend against Longlevens. But will she up her game and blow the budget and provide parmesan and basil for Jenks?

By then Russell had already left to return to the pub, sorry home. They felt like the same place as he seemed to have spent most of the weekend with his mates in one or t’other so they blurred into one. Sorry for the late match report but a late night Superbowl gave me enough time to write it up. Normal reporting service will resume next week….. For my punishment I did a 7 mile run to blow away the cobwebs so I did my post-match warm down to make up for lack of attendance at warm-ups.