Colts beat Cheltenham by a nose – a bloody nose at that

Stroud Colts travelled to the home of horse racing aka Cheltenham Tigers. Colts like racing. Colts like winning. Winning by a nose was regular in these areas. Would it be the same again this week ? Stroud were looking to get back to winning ways after a narrow 2 point loss to Minety the week before. The early than normal kickoff was a challenge for the players to arrive on time but come kickoff time a well drilled unit was ready to take the AGP pitch and enjoy a game of fast flowing rugby.

Parents were volunteering for shirt cleaning duties as a dry astro pitch meant a quick rinse would be enough. No need for multiple deep cleans that a mud fest in January would require. George’s parents won the golden ticket and looked forward to an easy laundry run – if only their son had kept to the script……

A sunny but breezy day was going to be a challenge for the kicking game, and on the AGP any sort of bouncing ball was going to be a challenge. Players ran onto the pitch with lashings of Vaseline to try and reduce the inevitable friction burns that were coming their way.

Forwards: Ben, Stoner, Ryan, Laurie, Darion, Freddie, Callum, Jake
Backs: Lewis, Will, George, Arthur, Beau, Joe, Alex
Subs: Jedd, Lucas, Rhys, James, Theo, Isaac, Freddie

Stroud kicked off and a competitive exchange of tackles and turnovers was the battle of the day. Cheltenham controlled the ball well and worked their way into the Stroud 22 but an infringement halted them in their tracks and Stroud kicked the ball to halfway to set up their first attack. Dependable Laurie snagged the lineout and Lewis playing scrum half fed crash ball Freddie who barrelled up the middle. Good rucking from Ben and Callum secured clean ball and it came out quickly to the backs. Will saw a gap and kicked diagonally to the Cheltenham 22. A leaping Beau plucked the contested ball away from his opposite number and kept the ball alive. He was tackled but an inside pass to the well supporting Alex kept the move alive and Alex managed to swerve a tackler and score a well worked try that Will converted. Typical Stroud – kick, catch, offload and convert. 7-0 to the away team.

Two tries in 2 weeks for full back Alex. He had a nose bleed being that high up the pitch in consecutive weeks. “Two tries is a seasons worth” commented his Dad. Quick witted Phil quipped “2 tries is a careers worth for his dad”. Medic Delia commented it was a centres job to score those tries and earn proper nose bleeds. How prophetic those words would be…..

Ben caught the next kickoff and smashed into contact – illegal in the eyes of the ref so a Stroud penalty kick to halfway. No surprises – Laurie wins the ball and Stroud attack again but this time the ball went to ground and Cheltenham had a scrum restart. A competitive scrum was edged by Cheltenham and they attacked into the Stroud half. Stout defending by winger Joe and Arthur forced a knockon. Stroud won their scrum and George crashed into contact. Crunch! Cartlidge Compressed ! Claret everywhere. Will ignored the distraction and heaved the ball upto halfway as Delia ran onto the pitch with sponges and plasters to try and clean up his face. The Cheltenham grounds staff rushed on with mops and disinfectant to try and clean their precious pitch. George’s parents had a concern for their sons welfare, but also for their electric and water bill as the laundry wash had now got really tough thanks to their sons nose bleed. The Stroud rugby mums soon offered tips because they’d spilt as much claret on their tops in a Bordeaux red drinking competition – but 15 Mums had been out-clareted by 1 nose. Understandably so George was taken off for more medical attention to be replaced by Rhys.

Cheltenham won the lineout but another backs move went to ground. Stroud had a great scrum push and made 5 yards. Will saw a gap and faked a pass outside and cut inside. 2 dummies later he was cutdown on the 5 metre line. The ball was kept alive with good forward rucking with Darion, Ryan and Callum contributing well - Beau had a chance but was kept from touching down by good defensive work. Cheltenham had a scrum under their own posts but Stroud fired up the engines and pushed them off the ball and won a penalty. An easy 3 points and Stroud were 10-0 up

The next kickoff was returned by Rhys. Then Ryan went Rhino and took the ball further up the pitch. Side entry to the ruck gave Cheltenham a penalty and they kicked to the corner. Stroud defended well and managed to steal the ball and Will kicked upto halfway but some poor tackling allowed the returner back into the Stroud 22 and he duly earnt a penalty as Stroud killed the ball. An easy penalty kick and it was 10-3 to Stroud.

Stroud kicked long and then stole the loose ball in the Cheltenham 22. Another attack was spoilt by the ball hitting the turf as players heard footsteps and forgot to secure the ball…… Cheltenham won their scrum and kicked it high into the sun. Alex donning his Aviator shades did well to catch the ball and kick it back but an overkeen kick chase with multiple offsides gave Cheltenham an easy escape. The teams traded penalties and scrums. Fresh legs were needed. Coach Jo sent sub Lucas into battle. Lucas was so fired up he ran in the opposite direction claiming he needed another warmup. 2 scrum resets later he was sent into the maelstrom. 10 metres later Stroud were still pushing Cheltenham off the ball. The bar staff ran for cover as they could see that Lucas had heard the apple tize “last orders” shout and was determined to order a pint – and was pushing the other 15 forwards with him. The ref consulted the new World RFU regs. Was it a 50-22 case? Nope that’s kicking game, not a massive forward shove. H&S common sense intervened and the ref awarded Stroud a penalty and the bar staff breathed a sigh of relief.

Stroud kicked to touch and a lineout in the Cheltenham 22. Another Stoner laser to Laurie and another attacking move that was denied by a good defensive set by Cheltenham. The next 5 minutes was interspersed by good runs from Jake and Stoner and good tackling with Rhys and Joe. A good run by Arthur up the middle threatened a score. A good offload to Beau and Stroud were sure to score but again Cheltenham held strong on their own line. A goal line drop out was awarded to Cheltenham. Stoner was brave and tried to join George in the claret stakes but his nose is made of titanium and his chargedown was blood free. Cheltenham panicked as Stroud threatened to score and gave away another penalty that Will converted easily. 13-3 and a slight cushion.

Another kick-off and Lauries turn to punish any tackler that got in his way. Stroud lost the ball at the breakdown and gave away a silly penalty. A quick tap and Cheltenham attacked right and threatened to score. An alert Will was well positioned and intercepted the ball and ran it back 60 metres to the Cheltenham 22 but a good cover tackle denied him a try. No worries – it was Freddie next on a combative flanker rumble. Both teams were stout in defense and cancelled each other out. 2 minutes later the ref blew for half time as it was a midfield stalemate and everyone needed a rest.

Half Time: Cheltenham Tigers 3 – 13 Stroud Colts

Plenty of subs were taken as a strong Stroud bench of “finishers” were chomping at the bit. Twin Theo was ready for his 1st action of the season with his cast removed. Delia had finished a blood transfusion and facial reconstruction on Pinoccio, sorry George, and sent him back into battle with 3 kilos of cotton wool to soften any future impacts.

The second half didn’t start well. Stroud got stuck in their 22. As soon as they kicked he ball away it was run back into the danger area. Cheltenham had a kickable penalty that they skewed left of the posts and Stroud had dodged a bullet. Wills 22 drop-out went deep and a kicking contest was waged. Will won it of course and made a net 20 metres for Stroud. Better still Stroud stole the Cheltenham lineout and Isaac weaved his way up the touchline and then earnt a penalty. A kick to the 22 and Laurie caught Freddies accurate throw in increasingly windy conditions. The forwards drove to the line and earnt a penalty. Stroud scrum 5 was the call. Lucas was off the pitch now taking a well earnt breather so Jedd was the grunt factor. Another well controlled scrum and Stroud had the ball out to the backs. Arthur on a slashing run but good defending kept Stroud out. Eventually Cheltenham stole the ball and kicked deep with the wind. Good interchange of passes with Will, Alex and Jake got the ball back to the 22. Stoner then took on anyone brave enough to tackle him and made a tough 10 metres and earnt a penalty. Kick to the corner. Laurie catch. Great forwards drive and this time Jake was the try scorer in the left corner. A difficult kick was just missed but Stroud were now leading 18-3

Laurie had another powerful kick-off runback followed by Freddie. The ball came out to the backs and George’s head said take contact, his nose said gruber. Common sense prevailed and a gruber kick it was that Cheltenham controlled well under immense pressure. Another 5 minutes of alternating possession around halfway was highlighted with runs by Jedd and Jake, and 2 crunching tackles by George. Nose still intact he was growing in his influence on the game. Cheltenham were enjoying the battle of the territory with the winds at their backs and increasing confidence in their ball skills. A try to the right was denied by a last gasp Alex tackle but Cheltenham didn’t panic and they quickly worked the ball left and scored in the opposite corner. The kick was missed with the score at 18-8.

Cheltenham ran the kick-off back strongly – until they met Stoner and he dumped them back 3 metres. Cheltenham wisely went wide instead, but that was a waste as Beau was strong in the tackle and another 2 metres lost. Cheltenham wisely went back to the forward runners. Crunch #1. Freddie knocked his opponent backwards. He unwisely kept running and Crunch #2 from twin Theo. The Cheltenham player thought he’d been concussed seeing 2 of everything. The ref did a quick player count in case we’d snuck 16 on the pitch. All legal and Theo’s season was up and running….until he got hurt 2 minutes later.

5 minutes later and it was 14 a side as the refs yellow cards saw some action. Stroud were getting on the wrong side of the ref and gifting Cheltenham easy territory and possession. The inevitable happened and Cheltenham scored another try in the left corner with more good backs moves. A fantastic kick from flat and wide closed it up to 18-15. Squeaky bum time for players, coaches and parents alike.
The players exchanged more banter as their competitive instincts took over. “THEY DON’T WANT IT” screamed the Cheltenham players. Perhaps we didn’t. The next 5 minutes would be critical.

Cheltenham had a good kick runback into the Stroud half. A diagonal kick to the 22 was well defended by Arthur and then Stroud earnt a penalty at the breakdown. Wills great touchfinder to the Cheltenham 10 was won by Laurie’s jump but another chance went begging as the ball was lost in the back division. Cheltenham won the scrum and looked to set their backs off again but an optimistic pass went to ground and Will scooped it up at pace and out run the cover defence and scored under the posts. Good conversion and Stroud had relieved the pressure at 25-15. “THEY DON’T WANT IT” shouted Stroud back to remind their opponents they very much “DID WANT IT” and wouldn’t collapse aka Gloucester vs Sale.

Jake wanted it. He caught the ball and ran it back well. Will kicked deep. “Thanks. We do want it” replied Cheltenham as they marched back down the pitch with well controlled moves with backs and forwards. 2 minutes later they smashed over the Stroud try line and kicked a conversion to close it to 25-22. Not to miss out on the banter the Cheltenham parents took on the chant “THEY DON’T WANT IT” and everyone smiled at the playground banter. There was probably some other words in the banter but I didn’t understand them.

The game was close to the death. Next score wins we all thought. Jo’s watch was showing 38 minutes but Russell’s sundial said 31 minutes so the ref agreed to a 5 minute extension as we were all enjoying the tussle on the pitch.

Cheltenham ran the ball back powerfully with their mullet headed flanker. He forced his way past some tired tackles. Only the full back left he thought. “I’ll be the hero and win the game”. 10 seconds later he picked himself up from the edge of the pitch and wondered how he’d got there. Another Alex try saving tackle was the answer – and a drag into touch to give Stroud the lineout. Perhaps with shorter hair he would have run faster or given Alex a smaller area to grasp hold of? Delia relaxed. Stroud must be good for the victory now. She detached the heart monitor from Jo and returned the defibrillator to the clubhouse as it was now last play.

But no Stroud weren’t going to win this easy. Good control of the lineout was spoilt as the ref spotted an infringement. Cheltenham were now in the box seat. A quick tap penalty and they ran right. Another penalty. A possible 3 points and a draw but Cheltenham wanted more. Another tap and go right. Good defending and they had to go left. James was there to deny them a scoring chance. But back for another penalty. This time Jedd and Freddie kept Cheltenham out and a turnover was stolen but it was back for another penalty.

This time it was a lineout in the corner that Cheltenham duly won and crashed the ball into contact. Something had to give….. George was in the melee. The Cheltenham runner saw his chance. As he looked up he saw George’s nose wider than the Stroud front row. No chance of avoiding the contact. He was stopped in his tracks. Cheltenham went for the push over try but the forwards liked a challenge. They held up the maul, then somehow stole the ball and Darion showing great alertness and managed to kick the ball out of play while under pressure from a Cheltenham tackler.

This time the ref did agree it was full time and Stroud celebrated the victory. George was back on the ground getting his 2nd blood transfusion of the day. No such thing as a day off for Delia.

Full Time: Cheltenham Tigers 22 – 25 Stroud Colts

Both teams congratulated each other for a game played in excellent spirit. Although they had lost an epic encounter Cheltenham were very sporting in defeat. Great game, great pitch, great opponents. I wonder what Fromehall will be like in Feb for the return fixture? Probably still need a 10 hour laundry session to remove the mud, and what’s left of Georges still blood stained shirt.

The Stroud players ran to the sideline to compare notes with their Mums. Hugs were abound. Was it Mothers Day? Nope just relief ! George wanted a hug but everyone ran a mile….can’t think why

We all went to the clubhouse and enjoyed their hospitality. Thanks to the ref as well for another well controlled game. Nothing malicious in the 2 yellow cards. Just passionate players trying to win the ball for their team!

Next game Minch away. I wonder if George’s nose will be fully recovered and ready for the local derby game? Who “nose” ?? ;-)