Banbury put to the Samurai sword as World Cup influences another dominant victory

The visitors to Fromehall were Banbury. Reigning Oxfordshire county champs. Famous for cakes and riding horses to a cross. Stroud were famous for – not much….perhaps Rush Skatepark – but that’s in Brimscombe. Lets just say the current highlight is a pretty good U16 rugby team…..

We had played them away last season and had a titanic battle in the rain and edged them 43-25 after leading 33-5 at half time. There were nerves for sure. We were missing 4 backs so inventive substitutions would be the order of the day, plus keep the ball in tight with the forwards and power our way up the pitch.

Rugby World Cup fever was taking over Fromehall:

• The Early’s had returned from Japan and had promised Sushi for a post-match meal
• Arthur had stolen the World Rugby Refs October edition from Eddie Jones and Jo was feverishly reading it
• Medic Delia had dusted off her RFU medical qualifications and was awaiting the call to help fix up Owen Farrells busted chin. Coach Phillips was again 1st in queue complaining of another injury. More ailements than Dot Cotton was the rumour amongst the parents…..
• England had qualified well for the knock-out stages, and a less than impressive Wales and Ireland were sure to join them
• The Scots – well the less said the better – so far. Unless they pull out a miracle vs Japan
• The Italians had a Prop crisis – injuries and suspensions. Carlo was looking to impress and earn a last minute call-up.
• Players were looking into their family backgrounds for any type Japanese heritage – looking for a call up to the quarter finals or better.
• Stoner and Callum were inventive in claiming Japanese passports because their Dads drove Mitsubishi trucks.
• Big Mac had taken it too far to drop the Scottish heritage…..He had visited the Japanese embassy and changed his name by Deed Poll to Archie San. Put that into a match report he winked. Challenge accepted young man…..

Forwards: Carlo, Liam, Bailey, Jedd, Laurie, Jake, Stoner, Mr T
Backs: Flash, Will, Dave, Arthur, Big Sushi, Perys, Lofty
Subs: Callum, Orgy, Darion, Bernie, Euan, Hilly, Keyan

Banbury kicked off and Stroud wearing white with their shirts inside out got totally confused and let their opponents in blue and white hoops win the short kickoff. Banbury recycled the ball quickly and attacked left. Good hands stretched the Stroud backs and a last gasp tackle by Big Sushi saved a certain try. Good forward play kept the ball alive and Banbury then attacked right and this time kicked for the corner. Lofty recovered it and Will then blasted it long but a high tackle by the kick chasers stopped the game. Ref Jo wary that World Rugby could be watching him and an officiating place in Rugby World Cup awaited if the pro refs kept making errors.

Banbury kicked to touch and had a lineout on the Stroud 22 but a great lift and intercept by Laurie relieved the pressure – but only briefly as Stroud were tackled into touch on their own 5. Stroud again pressured the lineout throw but Banbury managed to win it and attacked left. Their backs had pace and good hands so Stroud knew they’d have to defend well all game. Good pressure forced a Banbury gruber kick but it went dead. In his keenness to start fast Big Sushi took the 22 drop out but the ball skewed into touch. Banbury's lineout throw wasn’t straight so Stroud took a scrum restart near halfway. They still hadn’t escaped their half after 5 minutes of constant pressure. Was this their chance? A good scrummage gave Flash clean ball and he quickly set the backs off left. Dave had a long run into the Banbury half and was hauled down on the 22. Quick hands gave Liam and Jake chance to punch holes in the defensive line. Banbury had to suck in players to defend the middle so Will saw the gap and a perfectly weighted diagonal kick to the corner was caught by Big Sushi and he touched down for the first try. Expert kick #2 was the conversion from wide for a 7-0 lead.

Carlo caught the kick-off and went on a strong run. Then Liam went on a rampage. Carlo again on a pick and go. The forwards were going through the phases perfectly. A crash ball to Dave was adjudged forward so Banbury had a scrum restart on halfway. Stroud had a fantastic scrum push and turned over the ball and attacked left as all the backs shipped the ball to our new debutant left winger. Perys deputising in the #11 shirt took on the attack down the wing and showed great pace. The first XV watching on were very impressed, even more so when they were told that was flanker pace on display. Wait until you see the real wheels that Big Sushi and Billy can bring to the game. Perys got into the Banbury 22 and a great cut to an inside line was saved from a try by brave Banbury tackle. A few phases later Stroud knocked on so Banbury breathed a sigh of relief and prepared for a scrum. This time they battled manfully and managed to hold the Stroud scrum surge and kicked for touch. Laurie plucked the lineout ball cleanly and this time Jake pounded through the Banbury tacklers. Quick ball out to the backs was only going to mean 1 thing – a walk in try – but a loose pass and knockon stopped Stroud from walking in another try.

Banbury were pinned on their own 5 and this time the Stroud scrum destroyed Banbury again and Flash found himself looking at perfectly presented ball against the head as the Stroud forwards kept pushing Banbury out the back of the pitch, up the hill and towards Minch common. This time the backs went left but a long pass strayed forward and Stroud had missed easy try #2. Banbury had another scrum on their own 5 and again Stroud destroyed them. As the forwards kept shoving over the A46 a gap the combined size of Bailey, Liam and Carlo’s thighs opened up and Dave walked in a try untouched. An easy conversion for a 14-0 lead and Stroud had woken up big style.

Jake returned the kick-off and then Carlo went on a lung busting run. Will had found his kicking boots and another perfect diagonal kick bounced just in front of the Banbury full back and Big Sushi timed his run to perfection and caught it in stride. He evaded some other tackles and scored in the right corner. This time Will’s kick was missed. His boots were still celebrating the 2 cross-field try scoring kicks and forgot to settle down and help steer in a wide conversion kick.

Play was stopped for quarter time – another thing we had learnt from Oxfordshire RFU rules. Or was it the Japanese style humidity on a sunny Stroud day and another World Rugby reffing directive that Jo was enforcing?

Carlo caught the kick-off and crashed forward. Then Jake smashed forward to keep Banbury in retreat. This gifted space to Keyan who took the ball out wide. Speedster Perys then took the ball on further but eventually Banbury forced a turnover that they then gifted back as Keyan went into rip-tackle mode but the ball squirmed forward for a knock-on. Banbury elected to go uncontested scrums – a combination of front row injuries and Banbury front row still walking back down from the Common after the last Stroud surge. With clean scrum ball Banbury attacked right but were forced into touch but Stroud couldn’t capatilise as they lost their lineout. Banbury tried another backs move but Jake destroyed it with a strong tackle. Stoner then cleared out 2 players and Stroud had turnover counter-ruck ball and attacked down the left but went nowhere as the teams traded tackling and defending in equal measure.

3 minutes later Stroud had a lineout that Darion took well. Lofty went on a swerving run but got isolated and lost the ball. Banbury won their uncontested scrum and quick pressure from Dave forced them back. They kicked deep and this just gave Will a chance to whack the ball back even deeper so a net territory gain for Stroud. Banbury tried to spread the ball out quickly to the left but quick pressure from Big Sushi forced a Banbury knock on and Keyan was there to expertly pick up the ball at his ankles and trot down the right wing for another Stroud try and conversion to stretch the lead to 26-0.

Jedd was the kick-off master this time and clattered his way through 3 tacklers. Next was Dave and Keyan pounding their way deep into the Banbury half. Good clearouts from Stoner and Bernie at the ruck gave a massive channel for Mr T to smash into. 10 yards later he was finally hauled down. Now the backs move to walk in another try but another forward pass denied them. Banbury won the scrum and attacked with pace to the left. Stroud were penalised so Banbury tried to kick deep for touch but just missed. Will caught it cleanly and set Dave off to the left for another lung busting run. As Dave’s 2nd lung exploded in his chest it dislodged the ball – he claimed Japanese humidity – and the ball was knocked on in contact. Banbury had a scrum and attacked right but were tackled out near halfway. Euan won the lineout on a long Liam throw and the backs attacked right. A lovely combination of passes from Flash to Will, onto Jake, then back to a looping Will who slotted a great pass to Dave. He drew 2 tacklers and then released Keyan who finished of a great move down the right flank. Another good conversion and Stroud had jumped out to 33-0.

Banbury kicked off again and Big Sushi caught it and improvised with a kick straight back. Another high tackle from the keen kick chasers gave Banbury a penalty but they missed touch again. This time Will helped the ball into touch for them and the ref blew for the half.

Half Time: Stroud 33 – 0 Banbury

Stroud were reminded that the job was only half done and how well Banbury had come back last time from a 33-5 deficit. This time Stroud were determined to keep a clean sheet.

Stroud kicked off deep. Banbury kicked it straight back and Stroud knocked on. Banbury won the scrum and attacked right and then back to the left and showed good skills to put the Stroud defence under pressure. Here we go said the coaches – 2nd half collapse….. Not to be said Bernie as he combined with Orgy to force a turnover that released Darion on a run followed by Jake and Carlos breaking into the Banbury half. Will gruber kicked down the line and Banbury knocked on. They went to tap the ball out in frustration and watch it roll to touch but Arthur showing his un-Japanese manners stole in to pick up the ball and keep it alive. A run down the line, a 1-2 pass with Lofty and Arthur dived over in the corner for a try. Then in true Japanese style he trotted back and apologised to Will for not scoring under the posts. Never mind said Will as he drilled in the conversion from wide to make it 40-0.

Banbury kicked off. Will caught and attacked back and drew the tackler and shipped a sweet pass to Dave who finished it under the posts. Now it was 47-0.

Banbury hadn’t learnt. They kicked to Will again who this time passed it inside to the runaway Lorry. Sorry Laurie, that crashed through the central reservation, sorry halfway line, and made a right mess of the Banbury defenders. More gaps appeared and this time Dave kicked over but this time the Big Sushi dropped a certain try as his flippers slipped off the ball. The next few minutes the teams traded possession. Scrums were shared equally - because– they were uncontested. Banbury were gradually coming back into the game and were showing good commitment in the forwards and good hands in the backs. Orgys lineout throws were accurate as ever and Laurie and Darion took it in turns to catch the Orgy darts. Euan was tackling low as always – just like Sam Underhill. And just like Sam, Euan was taking the ball into contact in a new phase of his game.

The quarter ended with a lovely Mr T run and offload to Dave and another diagonal kick that the Big Sushi was close to scoring from again but the touchline got in the way.

The last quarter of the game was well contested by both sides. Banbury showed their championship credentials and kept the ball under good control and went through many phases to edge their way up the pitch. They got into the Stroud 22 and earnt a penalty. They quickly tapped left and smashed towards the try line but a combination of Stoner and Bailey held them out. Another penalty awarded and this time Banbury tapped and went in opposite direction and powered their way over for a well deserved try that was well converted. Banbury starting a comeback ? 47-7. 40 more points needed. Ref Jo’s smartwatch buzzed and he had received a Tweet from World Rugby. Last try wins was the new regulation that had just been announced – to try and distract all the focus on the World Cup refs getting confused over the high tackle rules. Banbury were ecstatic. They were on for a win!!

Banbury caught the kick-off and ran it back well up the left. Stroud turned it over and the backs attacked left. Lofty saw a gap and kicked sideways into space but Dave was in an off-side position so ref Jo had to call it back – just as Dave lit the afterburners and went for glory. Banbury missed their penalty kick and it went long out the back. Back for a Stroud scrum on halfway that was subsequently won.

Scrummaging was now allowed as Banbury were back to full strength as their Props had made it back from the Common…… Hilly took the ball and quick hands to Will and then to Lofty and finally to Flash made good yardage. Then the forwards took over. Liam crashed through 10 tacklers. Strike! We called as the skittles went in all directions. An excellent offload to Bailey and he took out the next 4 tacklers. Only 1 Banbury player was left standing. The backs attacked left to take the glory away from the forwards that had done the hard work. But that didn’t work as they forgot that Marks inventive subs had now put Flanker Jake on the left wing and he scored the try to claim one for the big lads. Kick missed but Stroud had now scored the last try so World Rugby regulation changes weren’t going to deny us.

The last kick-off was skyed. A certain Master Stone spilled it forward. In desperation his father tried to blackmail the match reporter to claim it was Keyan. Gonna cost you a lot of money Phil. Keyan has spent the last 15 minutes off the pitch injured. Not even my inaccuracies are that noticeable. The taxi arrived and Stoner jumped in and made a quick retreat in the hopes no one spotted his error…..

Banbury somehow were awarded a scrum on the Stroud 22. How did that happen said the match reporter who was somewhat distracted counting his bribery money. A knock-on shouted all the parents in unison. The match reporter didn’t believe them so he put it down to a new World Rugby law that Jo must have enforced…..

Banbury with the wind in their sails attacked again. They were going for the “Last try wins” rule again. They attacked strongly left and right. Another gruber kick went dead in the try area. Will took a quick dropout that bounced into touch on the halfway. Banbury not wanting to waste time took a quick lineout. They attacked through the middle but winger Perys had gone back to his normal flanker role and put in a powerful tackle that forced a turnover. The backs attacked left and more quick hands set Dave away and he scored the last try of the match down the left wing. The kick from wide was missed as the ref blew for full time.

Full Time: Stroud 57 – 7 Banbury

Team debrief was held and it was agreed this was the best performance of the season. Banbury had started strong and finished strong but the middle 35 minutes we had dominated them in all phases. Coach Samak was claiming credit for his inventive use of flankers as wingers. Coach Philips was claiming credit for having to many good forwards so could lend a few to the back division. It was all irrelevant anyway – our players were well coached enough to play in any position. Next week Dave at hooker with Hilly at #8.

The players rushed off to get changed. The thought of Sushi from Louise and Jonathon was too good to be true. In fact it was too good to be true. It had been confiscated by customs as they had forgotten to freeze it and had stunk out the plane on the long trip home. Fortunately the smell of garlic bread was in the air so Carlo had lost the Curry vs Italian food battle last weekend, but this time Italian cuisine was going to be the winner.

Banbury's complimentary match report here